I am perturbed.
I use the word with quite a bit of relish too; since I graduated and began the gentle segue into unemployment I don’t often have the opportunity to use a ‘good word’ like that. Some of you will know what I mean by a ‘good word’ – or none of you will and I’ll seem crazy – either way, I’ll press on, shall I?
I am, MOST FUCKING DEFINITELY, perturbed.
I may also be aghast. That is a good one too.
Unfortunately, while I relish the words themselves I take no joy in having to use them - this is because something is awry *small squeak of English-graduate geeky appreciation*
In fact, something AWFUL has happened!
Despite my adherence to the rules of The Skinny Pact – and don’t misunderstand me, I’m enjoying the structure and the solidarity that comes along with it – but despite my best efforts, my flailed attempts at exercise... I HAVE GAINED.
Plateaued for two days, then gained.
I am limp with shock, distress and muscle cramps. I DON’T exercise, and with good reason too! Not only am I FAR too fucking lazy, my chronic lack of balance is laughable in its baby-deer-trying-to-stand-for-the-first-time qualities. The lateral stepper thigh toner thingy, for example, though useful poses an embarrassing problem for me; how the hell do I use it without falling on my FACE? Attached bungee cords to tone my arms? Yes please! Though they DO throw me off balance even more!
Fantabulous.
See? FAR too much fucking effort, I would honestly MUCH rather just restrict harder and save myself the muscle aches.
But, I thought I’d give it a go, right? Up my calorie count by a couple of hundred – to 600 maybe, as I haven’t eaten as much as 800-1200 per day in over a year – just so I don’t pass out, and lose even faster!
Less healthy, but in my form of twisted logic, it’s fucking bulletproof.
But... gain. I don’t understand HOW I could have gained under these circumstances...
What is this nonsense?
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4 comments:
Muscle mass? It may be bloat, too.
At least, you can stay at a low calorie count. I'm working my way down and I keep exceeding.
If you have increased from your normal intake, perhaps it is bloat. Or, eh, intestinal fillage? You will certainly be poopin more at a higher caloric count. Once this stables out, your weight should begin dropping again. You are after-all still restricting.
xoxo zen
I certainly appreciate your use of the English language! Those were the best words I've heard all day, by far. Although, I spend most of my day with truckers and teenage boys who've dropped out to become rig pigs, only to find out it's hard work, so they move home and work as landscapers. I hate Alberta.
Good luck with the plateau.
I also want to appreciate your excellent vocabulary, although I have to say that I think the best word in your post was one you didn't comment on, "fantabulous"
awesome.
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